5 ways to bounce back from career disappointment
We’ve all been there in some way, shape or form.
A job application that didn’t make the interview pile.
An interview that didn’t lead to an offer.
An internal promotion that didn’t go to you.
A request for a pay rise that was turned down.
A redundancy that left you feeling there was more to it than met the eye.
A role you took that bore no resemblance to what you thought you were signing up for.
I’ve been there. When you experience any career disappointment, it’s normal for your self-confidence and motivation to take a hit. The key is how you bounce back and what you decide to do next.
Here are 5 things you can do to help build resilience - and ultimately get you closer to your dream career:
1. Allow yourself some time to feel all the feels, and then move on
Don’t be afraid to own the raft of feelings that land and talk them through with a trusted friend, colleague or coach. It’s ok to go beyond ‘disappointed’ – maybe you feel embarrassed, ashamed or worthless. I’m not being dramatic; people can genuinely feel this way after a career disappointment. The further along the process you got (second or even third interview!), or the more visible your effort (internal promotion for a role you had been seconded to!), the more likely you are to feel big feelings. The worst thing you can do is hide away and try to shut your feelings down without processing them. Be kind to yourself, set a time limit of a few days or a week to wallow, and then choose to move on.
2. Be realistic about what the outcome that disappointed you means – and what it doesn’t
The truth is, maybe the person that got the role was much more experienced than you. Maybe they presented better at interview. Maybe your would-be manager felt no rapport with you or that you wouldn’t be a great fit for the existing team.
These are hard things to hear, and even harder to accept. But none of them mean you aren’t a highly competent, skilled and experienced candidate, worthy of a career you love, and that you’ll never create one!
Can you take a step back, remove your emotions from the equation and ask yourself objectively “What can I learn from this?” Maybe there ARE skills gaps you need to address. Maybe you DO need to work on your interview performance. Maybe you’ve gone as far as you can in your organisation and it’s time for pastures new. Maybe Life is steering you towards something bigger and better, and more perfect for YOU.
3. Turn feedback into feedforward
If you made it to at least the first interview stage, or the career disappointment occurred within your current workplace, I’m hoping you at least got some useful feedback! Always ask for feedback, and then turn it into feedforward. Identify professional development opportunities and ways to up-skill, and if you are currently employed, any relevant budget up for grabs. Use this time to boost your skills and make yourself a more attractive candidate to your next employer.
4. Invest in the right tools for the job-hunt
A good CV will tell a story – your career story. It will be written in a way that showcases your skills, talents and achievements. When your CV is achievements-based rather than task-orientated you’ll feel a million dollars, and although you might not secure a million-dollar salary, you are more likely to negotiate a decent package with confidence. Achievements-based CVs hammer home the fact that employers need you as much as you need them. Consider investing in an expert to create a professional CV which does your achievements justice, and means you avoid selling yourself short for fear of appearing braggy. A professional CV writer will tease out all the little nuggets of gold you’ve probably left out and re-work the document until it’s so fabulous you want to hire yourself.
If you know your interview performance could be better, invest in some coaching so when the next opportunity arises (and it might be sooner than you think!) you’re ready to blow the panel away.
5. Indulge in some self-celebration
There’s nothing like a trip down memory lane to remind you how far you’ve come. Set aside 15 minutes or so to scribble down all the things that make you the unique, talented, accomplished person that I know you are! Include compliments that have stayed with you (even if you shied away at the time!), qualifications, training, awards, obstacles you’ve overcome, lessons that have helped you grow, all the things you are naturally good at, what others have said they value in you, the jobs you’ve held, any hobbies, volunteer work and activities you are awesome at. You can ask friends, family and loved ones to contribute – ask them “what’s the best thing about me?”, “what do you value in me?”, “what makes me a good colleague/friend”?